The Science of Sisterhood: Why Women Supporting Women Makes Us Healthier + Happier

Let’s be honest: perimenopause and menopause can feel like running a marathon you didn’t sign up for, in shoes that don’t fit, with no finish line in sight. The hot flashes. The brain fog. The mood swings that make you question if you’re starring in your own personal soap opera. It’s a lot. And yet, what makes it harder isn’t just the hormones—it’s the feeling that you’re doing it alone.

Here’s the good news: you don’t actually have to. Science keeps showing us that women who support women don’t just feel better emotionally—they live longer, stay healthier, and actually report greater life satisfaction. Translation? Your girl gang might just be more powerful than your multivitamin.

Take this for example: a 2020 study published in PLOS Medicine found that social support was directly linked to lower risk of depression and greater overall well-being in midlife women . And it’s not just about mood—loneliness and lack of social connection have been shown to increase the risk of cardiovascular disease, inflammation, and even premature death. On the flip side, women with strong social ties have a 50% greater chance of living longer compared to those who go it alone (Holt-Lunstad et al., 2010, PLOS Medicine). Yep—sisterhood literally saves lives.

And here’s the part I love most: women’s bodies are wired for connection. Research from UCLA coined the term “tend and befriend” to describe how women, especially under stress, are more likely to seek out connection rather than isolation. So if you’ve ever found yourself texting a friend in tears, or laughing on the phone about how you just put your keys in the freezer, you’re not just venting—you’re literally regulating your nervous system.

Which brings me back to why I started The Couch Club. Because while supplements and self-care rituals are great, the single most powerful medicine we have at this stage of life might be each other. A space to say, “Me too,” to laugh at the ridiculousness of hot flashes, to cry about the identity shifts, and to feel like you’re part of something bigger.

Hormonal. Hilarious. Holy. That’s the energy we’re bringing. And while the science makes it clear that community is medicine, the truth is—you don’t need PubMed to tell you how good it feels when another woman nods her head and says, “I get it.”

So if you’ve been white-knuckling your way through perimenopause or menopause, maybe it’s time to stop trying to “power through” alone. Pull up a couch cushion. There’s room for you here.

References

1. Holt-Lunstad, J., Smith, T. B., & Layton, J. B. (2010). Social relationships and mortality risk: A meta-analytic review. PLOS Medicine, 7(7), e1000316. https://doi.org/10.1371/journal.pmed.1000316

2. Santini, Z. I., Jose, P. E., Cornwell, E. Y., Koyanagi, A., Nielsen, L., Hinrichsen, C., ... & Koushede, V. (2020). Social disconnectedness, perceived isolation, and symptoms of depression and anxiety among older Americans (NSHAP): A longitudinal mediation analysis. PLOS Medicine, 17(1), e1003034. https://pubmed.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/32412799/

3. Holt-Lunstad, J., Robles, T. F., & Sbarra, D. A. (2017). Advancing social connection as a public health priority in the United States. American Psychologist, 72(6), 517–530. https://www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/pmc/articles/PMC8536070/

4. Taylor, S. E., Klein, L. C., Lewis, B. P., Gruenewald, T. L., Gurung, R. A., & Updegraff, J. A. (2000). Biobehavioral responses to stress in females: Tend-and-befriend, not fight-or-flight. Psychological Review, 107(3), 411–429. https://pubmed.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/10883679/